Are you being yourself?

To me, loving myself takes twice the effort. I come across people who are so confident, ambitious and uncompromising. I wish I can be that person, but I am not. I always fall into the 'too kind' category. I'd rather be on my own, rather than to be involved in a conflict.

If I am to write the list of my disappointment, it won't end. 2015 is like the whole iceberg hitting my face. I am trying my hard to get back up, but all in my head is just quitting... quitting... I try to remember all the good times that I have. The time when I could push myself forward and be the best of myself. I wonder what makes me to become that courageous and hungry.

I cannot tell if this is me, letting all of the fears and worries go or just being unproductive. I spend more time napping, snacking and wasting my time in the internet. It feels pleasant and guilty at the same time. But I know I need that, because I spend my time worrying and that has been enough...

I do not know.

Sometimes I just need a good help to figure this out.


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